I'm falling..falling like a stone that is blended with a feather and still I am ok..

I don't know where my life is headed at the moment and though I have no licence I am at the wheel, plotting the course. Its odd, I'm a waitress at Waffle House and not even making 3 dollars an hour, and yet I have a beautiful 2 bed 1 bath home, it warms my heart that I can go home and scream at the very top of my lungs and Not A SOUL will say a thing. I love my freedome, but it does come at a price..I miss my family and HATE the fact that until I graduate driving school and get my licence, I am at the mercy of others to get to work. But still my life finds ways to suprise me, like the fact that my heart has finally gotten over my ex..for the most part and started to feel somthing other than longing for him. I have a new guy, he comes in to my waffle house for his lunch breaks every week and it warms and speeds up my heart every time I think of seeing his goofy smile or just his face..and yet through all these emotions I have no urge to kiss him or things like that..he just makes me feel safe...warm and almost..loved? I don't want to think to heavily or my head will explode..Its just nice to have a smile walk in during my shift every week. I just hope my heart doesn't fall for nothing. I'm afraid, confused and just trying to cling to each wave of sanity I can. But I can still smile...thats somthing I guess.. I owe my friends and family for each and EVERY smile. Thank you to everyone who takes 5 seconds to think of me in a fond way, I love each and every one of you.